Thursday, July 24, 2008

The Stages of Grief

Did you hear the wail?

Bad news, I've just learned a pattern I submitted was rejected by Knitty. The good news? I can sell it myself now on Ravelry. As soon as I crawl out from under the heavy rock of Depression. Which will probably be when all the wine in the fridge and chocolate chips are gone. Gimme a minute, would you?

This would be a good time to run through the five stages of grief, don't you think?

Example - "Uh oh, a silly email mixup."; "Wait. Not use my pattern? The note said NOT?"

Example - "They obviously don't know a decent pattern when they see one. Mine is the best ever written. Ask my Mom."; "If my model had even TRIED to smile in the photo, something he could never do for our wedding pictures, this wouldn't have happened. It's completely his fault."

Example - "Maybe if I offered to get a different model, someone who's able to freakin' SMILE in the photo.";(I'm really good at the anger stage.) "How about a new description? Something wordy, edgy, and possibly plagiarized so they'll like it."

Example - "Of course they rejected the pattern. It's totally retarded and should be shot, like me."(This last phrase is best cried out while trying to crawl under the bed. Add to the pathos.); "Everything I do is stupid. Except the dishes. And cleaning toilets." "I'm going to need a Prozac I.V."

Example - "Hm, well, at least I can now sell it on Ravelry. As soon as I retake the pictures with a model who doesn't do an Eeyore impression in every photo." (I know, still with the anger.); "Maybe I could write a book 'Being Rejected for Fun and Profit'?" Which, would probably be rejected and I'd have to do all this all over again. Still, a cute little pattern book could be fun to write...

It's been an hour and I'm still feeling bad about it. How long does it take for these stages, anyway? Since I'm so depressed and angry over this, I'll probably give up designing. Of course, there's a sock pattern I've promised, a sweater pattern I'm in the middle of, and several other pattern ideas I need to do. After them, that's it. When all my stash of unassigned-to-a-pattern yarns is done, I'm not designing any more.

People who have seen my yarn room know I'll have to exceed my life expectancy or sell off my stash to be able to stop designing. ;) I actually have to design, even if it's only for family to wear/endure.

After all that, how do I really feel? They had a limited amount of patterns to publish, I'm a first-timer and not heavily popular. They need web traffic, who doesn't? The pictures weren't taken outside and didn't heavily show detail. My description of the pattern was a bit concise, unlike my other writing. It could have been THE perfect pattern, but with all these little nit-pickies against it, there's no way for the sweater to have been included. Too much competition for the submission to be the slighted bit imperfect. Ah well, work harder on the next one is all I can do.


ChelleC said...

Laura, oh my goodness, I am so sorry about the reject. I know you have a personal stake in this, but believe it or not, we were ALL holding our breath, crossing our fingers and saying little prayers that your sweater would be accepted for the great pattern that it is.

I am so sorry I didn't see this entry until now or I would have called you, come gotten you, and we could have had a good cry, and a coffee drink, together.

But just the way you so candidly and charmingly wrote about the grief experience is telling in itself of what a promising writing and designing career you will have. Unfortunately, rejection is part of the biz - the UNhappy part. BIG HUG.

And if it makes you feel better, realize that it took them a long TIME to reject it, and I bet they were strongly considering it. Keep submitting and they'll become more familiar with your work.

Carol said...

Darn those Knitty people anyway. I should go beat them up for rejecting you. At least give them a black eye so they cannot read anymore patterns to reject....

No seriously, don't let this discourage you from futher submissions. This was only the first one. I admire you for even submitting something.

Now when your are throught eating the cheese with your well deserved whine go forward and submit again. Lord knows you have plenty of yarn to do it.

As you know I have suffered may disappointments this year so I definitely know how you feel about wanting to give it up but I just can't let the bastards get me down. I know that the odds are that something will go right soon. I just have to keep trying.

Anonymous said...

Well you know what, that sweater was the best thing on ravely or that stupid website, plus it didn't really matter if Dad smiled or not because it was made right, set right and on the right person. They were even lucky for you to send it in because you would have been busy teaching classes, and knitting GREAT things for everyone who wanted you to make them because you are great at what you do.
'Nuff said!

Laura said...

It's ok, Chelle. We were out of town, anyway. The Guy had both family and class reunions last weekend. We had a blast. He gave me a lot of reassurance and ego boosting on the way there. Considering how widely published YOU are, I have to give an aw shucks at your comments! Thank you bunches!

Hi Carol! Yeah, the yarn wouldn't let me quit, anyway. Now that I've had time to sleep on it, if you try enough, someone will accept your submission, if only to shut you up. :D

Gosh, Anon, I wonder whoever could you be??? Do you think it could be someone I know very well, someone who has half my DNA and thinks everything I knit, even if it's pink, is for her? Thank you, Frygirl. I can only hope that one day you run a publishing house.

Susan said...

Oh my..I'm getting to this late. What's wrong with them anyway??? Maybe if your model looks rather starved...or has their ear stretched out with one of those ear stretcher things. They're just wrong and you know it. Someday they'll be really sorry when you're all rich and famous and doing books. But I'll be all smug because I can say "I knew her before she was famous. And she even used to speed past my town" Hugs girl!!

Slow and Steady Wins the Race