Still pissed. Posted something in the forum about 'Wouldn't it be nice to hear from the sick one in here, like she promised?' She replies, saying, was busy (yeah) and sorry (not) if she pissed anyone off (me).

Fine.

It's not the first time I've let a friend go, and it probably won't be the last.

Ok, ok. This is supposed to be about me striving for perfection. I'm weeding through my todo list, doing the Yoga(100 cals), dishes, making bed, picking up clothes, and of course, eating. So far, it's been 70+120+80 calories today, and I've burned off 220 on stairs and treadmills, and 100 calories in weightlifting. If I stick to the plan of cleaning house for an extra hour today, that adds 260 to the burn list. I binged on cookies yesterday, and if I space it out, I can lose those calories and then some. If I stick to this, I'll have a net intake of -180 calories. I don't know about the hour of housework, and really, I do need to do it since I skipped the list entirely over the weekend. All my undone weekend chores are sitting around, staring me in the face. :(

I stopped by the school to drop off money for the librarian's baby gift (yes, the one who in her last month is just NOW looking pregnant), and apologized for my workout clothes. :P The secretary said I was lucky, she has to get up at 5am to work out. Now, see, that's one of my "If 'I' were perfect" things I tell myself all the time. A 'perfect' person wakes up at 4:30am and works out at 5:00-6:00, gets ready for work, and is there by 7:00. It would be far easier for me to stay up until 4:30 than it would be to wake up then. Unless there's a plane to catch. For some reason, I'm UP no matter what the time if I have a chance of going somewhere fun. :D

I think I'm going to do something fun. I know, I have that hour of cleaning house, but still. I've been really depressed the past couple of days, maybe even the past week, and I think I want to curl up with some knitting and a kill-me funny movie. I don't think I deserve it, but I do know I need it. I've added some inspriational quotes, then some 'mood of the moment' quotes, too. On the letting a friend go quote, is it me who's letting a friend go, or have I already been let go......?