Friday, November 07, 2003

Hungry hungry hungry.

That eating thing I did last week spoiled me rotten. Now, my tummy actually THINKS it needs food. I knew I wasn't doing any favors to myself by eating too much.

Am I whining? Probably. I can deal with cutting out some of my favorite foods. After a while, I don't even miss them. But right now, sticking to or below 1200 calories in is tough. Tonight is pizza night and it's hard to wait. Since kid sister is coming over tonight to do laundry, I'm popping pizzas in the oven now. I've allowed myself half a pizza, it's already entered, but I'm also filling half a large plate with salad (minimal dressing). Usually, I eat off the smaller plates.

Ok, done with pizza. Very tasty and now it's Bonus Treks time.

Workout was good, I ran/walked for 30 minutes. The average speed was 4.7mph, a bit of a jog. I did happen to bump up the running to 7.5mph, just to see if I could do it, since it's a goal for later to run 3 miles at that rate. So far, it's 2.4 at 4.7, obviously. :)

I keep checking my emails, the answering machine, for word from hubby. Nada, and it's Friday, for crying out loud. He's in the States. If he were overseas, I'd understand not calling or emailing, but surely the others have lives that aren't being interrupted and can cut hubby loose enough to email.

I've noticed lately that I'm feeling 'harsh' towards myself. Like, when I read other people's web logs, I refrain (or want to) from giving pats on the back or encouragement. Why? Because I'm thinking they'll reply "So? Why should I give a rat's butt what YOU think?" I don't know why, but I keep thinking other's attitude towards me is probably a "YOU are talking to ME?", like I'm bothering them by exsisting and who am I to talk to them. Does that make sense? Have no idea why I'm suddenly feeling so insignificant, usually this is reserved for PMS and that type of moody body chemistry.

Could it be the lack of calories making me go stark raving mad??? Could it be I NEED a healthy slice of cheesecake??? I think not, but I like the idea. :D Most likely it's due to the lack of sleep since hubby left. With the car being cut into, plus our basement window screen being ripped away, I can't sleep with hubby being gone. We have an alarm system with a beep every time a door or window is opened, there's a couple of guns where I can get to them, plus as always 911 is on the speed dial, so we're not open to the world and waiting for robbery.

What does that have to do with diet and health? Cortisol from not sleeping leads to pot belly, something that I'm actually losing. While my weight hasn't changed from 155, I measured and I've lost nearly two inches in my tummy! Yay! My chest, measured under the armpits and above the bust, and my waist are the only two places that haven't lost. The chest has increased due to back and pectoral exercises, I'm sure. The waist being the same I can handle, just as long as the tummy is decreasing. That's what really makes me look fat. Other than the fat itself.

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Slow and Steady Wins the Race