Wednesday, March 15, 2006

From zero to postal in sixty seconds

I swear to God, if I get one more f*ing call from "Computer Literacy and Benefits Program", I will drive to Denver, if that's where they really are, and kick their Punjabi asses. They called TWICE today, waking me from a nap both times. Why napping? Because I'm beat! I've caught Hub's cold and don't know how he stayed awake through it. I'm a zombie woman.

The two times I was called today were number five and six. Six times I've told these bastards, all named "John", "David", "Sam" or some other piece of shit 'Americanized' name, that no, I don't want a 'free' computer (for $299), a 'free for life' internet connection (at $24 a month), and 'free' $1000 (for God knows how much). Do not want it, am on the state and federal do-not-call lists (which does NO good in this case), and have TOLD them clearly "Do NOT call this number again, I'm NOT interested".

Not only is the daily call for this scam pissing me off, the fact they can barely speak English enrages me. Most of our larger companies' call centers are already IN India. THOSE people can speak English well enough for me to understand them. If they're going to scam me, at LEAST be clear in the enunciation. Even better is that this internet company doesn't have a website or domain name, I couldn't speak to a manager, and they wouldn't give me a phone number to call until I had a confirmation code. That probably meant I needed to hand over a credit card number.

The upshot is, if some Bollywood reject calls and harasses you to take one of their free computers, tell them to fuck off. So far, nice, then firm, then angry language hasn't worked. Next time, it'll have to be foul.

Sorry Mom. I think I've been very nice until now by not telling them that if they continue to call, I'll shove that computer so far up their ass they'll be shitting floppies for a week. It's silly I know, but a girl can dream.

If I don't answer the phone, use my cell number. It's all right. I think the extra cell charges would be worth not having to listen to some foreign huckster.

I do have a few friends from India and can understand their accents. This particular brand of telemarketers piss me off because they insult me with their adopted names and laziness in learning the scammee's language.

Right. In other news, I'm still working on Mom's birthday present. Shhhhh, to those who got to see it on Saturday. Chelle took a wonderful picture of my ill gotten gains from Knit Picks. Thankfully, Jen put the skeins of sock yarn back. You can see her holding them in the left of the picture. Every Friday I'm planning on typing up a review of each yarn there. I tried to get as neutral colors as possible, just so there's no color bias. We compared Socks that Rock (STR)yarns, totally fun. I think Jen is excited to be in the official STR club. At any rate, I'm thrilled for her. It'll be great to see what she brings in every quarter.

Fry had a program today. She's so cute, singing in the school choir. We had to suffer through a PTA meeting to get to the good stuff, and Fry was worth it. On Saturday, she was thrilled when Chelle asked if she was 'Fry'. Chelle herself has a tall, lovely daughter. I'm always amazed when women my age have teenagers for children. We just CAN'T be old enough! I mean!

I'd better go wash my face before bedtime and apply the anti-aging goo with a putty knife. :D


ChelleC said...

Tee hee - yeah, I think Fry is such a cute nickname. She's a cutie and it fits her so well. But I noticed the surprised look on her face. Like, "How did you know?" Ha!

My daughter is only 5'3" (same as me) but she looks taller for some reason? Not sure why. She's a little theater diva - so she has a graceful air about her. Great kid. I am so proud of her goodness. How did I get so lucky???

Oh the yarn shot - yeah I thought it was GREAT!!! When I walked in and saw all that luscious KP yarn sitting there, I was so glad I'd come to the meeting - I breathed a big sigh and thought, "Yeah, I'm home here amoungst my yarn loving peeps!"

Laura said...

LOL! You should have seen Fry's face when Toppa and I were talking diets. I'd said something about our house being a 'no-fry' zone. She had this horrified look, poor baby.

Ahhh about your daughter. That explains a lot. She has the reediness of a teen but carries herself maturely. I'd been trying to pin down why she seemed older but still very sweet and young, and the grace is it. I think the same thing about Fry as you do yours, how did I create someone so wonderful?

I'm glad you were there, too! You tend to be the life of the party. Your mom looks just like you! I could already tell that she's a sweetheart.

Some of that KP yarn is so soft I can't even feel it. I can't wait to do the reviews. It'll be exciting.

Steph said...

Simma Down sista! LOL I sure wish I would of known about the singing thing last night! >:|
(as i sat with nothing to do)
bah bah

Laura said...

Heck, woman, I thought I DID tell you. It was Kristyn on your screenname yesterday. I thought it was you until she kept referring to MY mom instead of OUR mom. I was like, whaaaa.

Oh, you just wait until one of those curry-laden foes call YOU. If the house weren't such a total wreck, I'd be hiding out at Hobby Lobby right now, fondling yarn and avoiding call number seven. I'm so totally not answering the phone today.

Er, maybe not fondling, maybe just looking at. ;)

Steph said...

MMMkkk yea better choice of words know I am never home during the weekdays! LOL and no sorry to say you SAID NOTHING! :P
Oh well...get to feeling better...Have fun and mom and dads...and dont worry bout me...:(

ChelleC said...

My Mom is like me, but a bit more reserved and quieter.

Slow and Steady Wins the Race